TheDistinguishedEnglishBulldog’s Blog

July 30, 2009

A long overdue aloha

Filed under: Days in the life — by thedistinguishedenglishbulldog @ 3:22 am
Apologies for the extended absence – perhaps the following pictures of me in paradise island misery will make it up to you.
Can you see the fear in my eyes? What is all this??

Can you see the fear in my eyes? What is all this??

Crikey - I might as well get this over with... for shame!

Crikey - I might as well get this over with... for shame!!

And just in case you missed it, a recap: Grass skirt? Check. Bikini top? Check. Lei necklace? Check. Lei bracelets? Check. Loss of dignity and self-respect? Check and double check.

Why??? Why??

Why??? Why??

As a payback, I have since destroyed 3.5 (don’t ask re: the 0.5) dog beds and have began protesting profusely when it comes to bedtime – barking, whining, digging, chewing, etc. They made the (amateur) mistake of letting me sleep for a few nights loose – no crate. I had to house to myself! Well except the human’s bedroom, which is baby-gated for the cat’s protection. And the office, which is closed for Polly’s protection. And the guest bathroom, because I’m inordinately fascinated with the treasure can (aka trashcan). And the guest bedroom – something about the humans not trusting me. Hmph.

So anyways, the freedom was wonderful. On night #1 I had a bit of an accident(s) in the house. All over the living room, to be precise. And on night #2, it happened again. The humans didn’t see the irony in me doing #2 in the house on night #1 and doing #1 on night #2. And they were especially not amused by being wakened at 3AM to those delightful smells. But seriously – how was I supposed to know? The cat gets to go in the house, so why can’t I? And before you suggest it, I already tried fitting into that box contraption of his. Let’s just say that it’s meant for those more petite than I.

So, in my protest to these ridiculous dress up games and my new-found imprisonment duting the night hours, I will continue to do anything I can do to let the humans acutely aware of my happiness. I do get temporarily distracted when the offer of new toys and anything edible though. But it’s only temporary.

If the bullie’s not happy, nobody’s going to be happy.

Disgruntledly yours,

The Distinguished English Bulldog


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